'Because pajama pants aren't suitable daytime attire'

Where to from here -

I don't know what to put on this winter.

I used to know what to wear and though I didn't always want to wear it, there was still some comfort in knowing. I mean, I hated wearing snow-pants to school in junior high. I thought they made me look like a nerd (which I kind of was). I also thought they made me look like the kind of straight edge kid who still listened to her mom (which I also kind of was). But there was no confusion as to what I should be wearing. The seasons were definable like that back in the nineties. You wore the shorts in the summer, windbreakers in the fall, ski-doo mitts in the winter, rubbers in the spring. Easy. Not to suggest that the weather was always on the reliable side. We live in Newfoundland for heaven's sake but this, I have to say, takes the cake. I mean....what is on the go with this winter anyway?

Because as far as I'm concerned, there is no winter without snow. Maybe they consider this mild, wet nonsense winter in Vancouver but it's not winter here and the whole effect has left me a little unsettled. All of Christmas had that calm-before-the-storm feeling to it. I was constantly expecting a tidal wave to come crashing down over our house finally finishing the never-ending game of cards my family was playing. There was an eerie kind of silence right through January and even now what little snow we have amounts to nothing compared to monstrous snowbanks of the past. You could walk right onto roof tops when I was a kid. And everyone seems as confused as I am about appropriate apparel and a certain basic principal of dressing has fallen to the wayside. A principle that must still be obeyed regardless of climate uncertainty and zombie inducing greyness overhead. We have to be diligent...

Because pajama pants aren't suitable daytime attire no matter what the weather.

The number of times I have been boarding a flight lately and witnessed countless fellow passengers decked out in full sleep gear drives me a little nuts. By all appearances, these individuals just literally rolled out of bed and into the airport. Now, I understand flying can be uncomfortable. Lord knows Air Canada is not going out of its way to make it a pleasant experience for any of us but why insist on adding to the dishevelment that already exists?

Certainly flying in one's sleepwear cannot be improving the flight for anyone. And don't bring a pillow from your bed. You don't look prepared...you look homeless! It's like declaring to the world that you have given up on life. Yes, global warming has taken a hold and thrown your closet into upheaval but that is no reason to stop getting dressed altogether. Changing your pants is not that time consuming. I shouldn't feel like I'm moving through life in a communal bed. Sometimes I find myself wondering...who invited me to this sleepover? Who's bedroom is this anyway?

Also, the hygiene factor is always a plot point in my story boarding the sleepwalker's day. I don't think it's a stretch to question someone's personal cleanliness when they couldn't be bothered to get dressed because that is what it is. Being out and about in Mickey Mouse flannel pajama pants does in no way count as getting dressed. Admit it. You didn't. And it's a worldwide problem. The Shanghai City Government has formally requested that citizens not wear pajamas out in public and now I am formally requesting this same thing of you.

Mind you, I'm not suggesting anyone dress for the New Year's ball when heading out to grab their eggs and milk. You don't have to gussy yourself up to run to the drug store or stress about what to shove on every time your kid misses the bus. I know it's winter, a winter without snow and all the joys that snow provides, I know. People are in the dumps because it's dark and gloomy but you don't have to look in the dumps too. Sure maybe getting properly dressed will left spirits and increase productivity. Besides, it doesn't take a whole lot of brain power to throw on a pair of jeans. Hell, why not throw on your snow-pants while you're at it? Wishful thinking never hurt. Maybe we could all collectively will it to snow by dressing for it.